Ok, so I'm reading through my emails and I notice 2 friends have a blog listed. "How cool is that!", I'm thinking. So I continue to read on and by the end, I have decided I want one too. Just one problem.....what on earth am I going to "blog" about? How would I begin and who on earth would actually read it? Ok, so maybe that was 3 problems. But no one is actually counting but me, right? Despite the unknown I have decided to plunge in and go for it.
So basically at this very moment I should be trying to get some sleep. My 3 1/2 yr. old and 2 mo. old sons are actually both asleep at the same time! And what am I doing? Playing on the computer, longing for some adult conversation in one form or another, trying to get rid of a little stress. *And all the stay at home moms scream, "Amen! Been there, done that!". So here I am. Nothing incredibly interesting to say. Just analyzing my day yesterday and how I could have been soooo much better to my family and myself had I made some simple changes in my outlook. For instance, rather than trying to focus on cleaning and organizing my closet - don't know why I even attempted that one - I should have focused my attention on my 3 yr. old who was CRAVING attention from mommy. Attention other than, "please get a diaper for mommy", that is. And my poor hubby, coming home to a frazzled, worn out mom who wants nothing but a little time alone, handing him the children and then complaining he isn't doing this or that right.
Focus. Its all about my focus. When I place my focus on what I want to do rather than on the needs of those around me, everyone around me, including myself, becomes frustrated before long. That old saying, "when mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy" really is true. Had I simply placed my focus on my God given roll as a mother to my older son while the younger was sleeping, I would not be feeling guilty for pushing him aside throughout the day and contributing to his acting out for some of mommy's attention. Had I focused my attention on loving daddy when he came home rather than complaining about how tired I am and immediately turning the kids over to him and giving orders before he had even put his bag down, we may have said more than 2 or 3 sentences to each other. Focus! Not that taking some time for myself or needing a break or even blowing off a little steam is wrong, but there is a better way. God's way.
How about beginning my day in prayer and meditation, asking God to give me wisdom to make the right decisions throughout my day? To help me set my priorities in order. Was is really all that important that my closet was neat or was it more important to read the book my son asked me to read to him 2 or 3 times throughout the day? Or take time to go over the alphabet or counting m&m's, reviewing His Bible verse for church, coloring a page, singing a song. Its not like any of these things are exactly hard to do. Truthfully, what could be more important than these little spaces of time throughout our day together.? Well, duh! It doesn't take a genius to know the answer to that one. That's one thing I love about God. He makes our part in life so easy. Seek His Wisdom in each situation and He will guide us. Everything He wants me to do, He has promised in His Word to enable me to do it. He will never give me more than I can handle. No matter how little sleep I have, how badly my body aches, how many dishes or laundry loads need to be done, I CAN do ALL things through CHRIST which strengtheneth me. I need to focus on Him, listen and trust that He knows what is right for me, and then obey what He wants me to do. Just like the old song says, "Trust and Obey, for there's no other way to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey".
So why is it then that I continue to try to plow through my day without as much as acknowledging His Desire and Willingness to help me? Obviously, every time I approach my day without my focus on God first and His will for my life, I end up miserable. The best days are always the days my attentions are off of myself and on those around me. Now many would stop here and say, "Whoa! You need to take care of yourself!" and you would be right. However, when I am miserable because of the way I've treated others, one of the best ways to care for myself is to care for those around me. When I spend a fantastic afternoon with my son or have a nice dinner and conversation with my husband, I feel so much better. The atmosphere of the entire household is a much more relaxed and enjoyable place to be. Dare I even say, A Haven of Rest. A place everyone wants to be rather than a place everyone wants to escape from.
Oh Lord God, be with me this day. Help me keep my eyes focused on You and Your will for my life today. Help me to be the Wife, Mother, and Woman you would have me to be. May Your love for others be active through me and help grant the peace and joy in the lives of my family and friends as I follow Your plan for my life today.
